Ortman stacks the deck with wisdom for Spokane-goers
By virtue of no authority, I hereby name David Ortman of Seattle the poet laureate of masters track. At least for this week. On the eve of the Spokane masters nationals, starting Thursday, Dave has tweaked a famous Kenny Rogers tune, making it ours. On a more serious note, check the Forum for a lively debate on late registration — and Andy Hecker’s thrwarted efforts to allow folks to enter any meet on the day of event. (Andy posted a long note under his handle trackinfo.)
Here is Dave’s humble offering to the masters gods:
The Master (with apologies to Kenny Rogers)
By David E. Ortman (M55) Seattle, WA
On a warm summer’s evening, on a plane bound for Spokane
I met a masters athlete; we were both too tired to sleep
So we took turns a starin at the stewardess’ drink cart
Til boredom overtook us, and he began to speak
He said son I’ve made a life out of readin people’s faces,
An knowin what events they’re in by the pain in their eyes
So if you don’t mind my saying, I can see you’re in some pain now
For a taste of your Gatorade, I’ll give you some advice
So I handed him my bottle, and he drank down my last swallow
Then he reached up and turned on his seat’s overheaded light
And the plane got deathly quiet, and his face lost all expression
Said, if you’re gonna run and jump, boy, ya gotta learn to play it right
You got to know when to jump em, know when to dump em
Know when to walk away and know when to run
Never count your injuries when the starter shoots the pistol.
There’ll be time enough for PT when the runnins done.
Every masters athlete knows the secret to survivin
Is knowing the condition of your legs and arms and back
Cause every meets a challenge and every event a minefield
And the best that you can hope for is die on the track
So when he’d finished speakin, he let his seat sink backward
Turned off the overheaded light and faded off to sleep
And somewhere in the darkness, his legs were sprinting onward
But in his final words I found a band-aid I could keep
You got to know when to jump em, know when to dump em
Know when to walk away and know when to run
Never count your injuries when the starter shoots his pistol
There’ll be time enough for PT when the runnins done.
Brilliant.
Hey, Dave! Can I have the movie rights?
One Response
Great Job Dave—I hope you have an excellent competition and take home a lot of Gold–your lyrics are so true–last year in Orono I won 4 Medals–this year I am home nursing a hamstring injury–Masters Track and Field not for the feint of heart!!!
Jump and Run On!!!
Leave a Reply